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I don’t totally suck anymore

January 8, 2012

It is made of plastic. White, shiny plastic, with adhesive on the back.  It measures one half inch by three inches and is wrapped around a white cloth belt. It is a piece of tape.  Only a piece of tape.  Perhaps it was made in China and came here on a tanker surrounded by children’s toys or door knobs or coat hangers.  I would guess it’s value to be perhaps one tenth of one cent.  Yet I have been staring at it as if it were a Faberge egg or an Olympic gold medal.  Why, you ask?  That tiny piece of tape represents my first “promotion” in jiu jitsu.  I am now, according to the plan, one fifth of the way to blue belt.  This reaction, I realize, is patently absurd.  Getting all self-congratulatory about this would be like training for a marathon and boasting that you could already make it around the block a couple of times.  Besides, belts are the point of training no more than grades are the point of learning.  The knowledge and skills themselves are the reward. But…ok, I admit it.  I’m like a twelve year-old who got a gold star on his book report.  It’s ridiculous and yet another indicator that I have gone mildly insane.  But I don’t care.  Who has two thumbs and one white stripe?  These guys!

Of course the guy on the right happens to have a black belt as well, which is also pretty cool, I suppose. (All joking aside, I can’t thank Professor De Freitas, and instructors Wes and Dave enough for their incredible teaching and encouragement.)  But now that I’ve patted myself on the back for graduating to essentially one grade above useless, its time to get back to work.  And speaking of working and going mildly insane, I will close today with a household tip for the domestically challenged martial arts dad.  With the stringent time requirements of training and classes, it may seem that domestic chores are just frivolous time wasters getting in the way of your inevitable jiu jitsu greatness.  This attitude, though completely understandable, may generate some…friction, shall we say in the household from Baby Mammas who expect outlandish things like support or doing your share of the housework.  Don’t worry!  It’s “Domestic Crosstraining” to the rescue!  What’s that, you ask?  Domestic Crosstraining is the latest trend in martial arts conditioning.  Get in great martial arts shape without gyms or expensive equipment and have a spotless house while you’re at it!  How, you ask?  Well, here’s an example.  If you happen to have a brick floor, head down to your local all-mall and pick up a fitness ball and two scrub brushes.  Then fill up the bucket and get all Daniel-san on that shizzle, as shown below.  Great for core strength, arm endurance and really getting those bricks to shine!.  Wax on, wax off, baby!

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3 Comments
  1. Dion permalink

    Grats, Dude!

    Yer already at a point where I wouldn’t mess with you…
    Ya know, without a gun… or a car.

  2. David permalink

    Hi,
    Are you responding to posts? I started BJJ at 49 and would love to chat with you about it…

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